Posts tagged christmas

A Broody Little Christmas

I’ve spent the day in a Santy hat…of course it’s only 11am or so, I really shouldn’t be complaining.  We put up the tree last night and now suddenly it’s Christmas.  The word tree can be a bit misleading.  It’s a crappy 3ft piece of plastic pretending to be a tree.  It looks pretty though…if the lights are off.  Not because you can’t see it but because the fibre optics, lights and decorations look really well in the dark.  They do.  *nods sagely*

December is really having a wierd effect on us.  We argued over what tree to get yesterday.  What size, what colour, what price and we weren’t even in the same building.  He kept asking me what I wanted, I kept telling him what I wanted and he kept disagreeing with what I wanted.  “Get whatever the fuck you want then!” I shouted at him before hanging up the phone.  He got the one I wanted.  *looks sheepish*

Is it just me or does December make everything irritating?  I think he’s worried I’m pregnant I’m so hormonal at the moment.  I just want to get a move on with everything and he’s all lacksy daisy about it.  I don’t want to do everything on Christmas Eve this year!!  Speaking of being pregnant, I want to be.  He doesn’t want me to be.  Hmm…that’s never happened before so I’m not quite sure what to do about that. 

This time last year I was around 6/7 months pregnant and I was huge.   Nobody thought I’d make it past Christmas, I was seriously ginormous.  Before I gave birth, my skin was starting to wear very, very thin it was so stretched.  Christmas four years ago, I was going through unbelievably bad morning sickness and I spent Christmas day alone.  I couldn’t keep down water at that stage, it was horrible.  So I’m not really sure why I want to be pregnant again when I think about things like that.  Although I’m very sure when I look at my children play together.  Another one would fit in nicely.  I can see Mr. Claire buying me a puppy instead.  He doesn’t like how I look at babies on the telly.  Not my fault I’m permanently broody.  I actually think there is something wrong with me.  I’ve been broody since I was 12…:)

 With that thought….have a great day 😉  I know, I really have to stop talking about Christmas…and babies…and Christmas.  I keep planning on talking about other things but it always comes back to “see above”.  Okay, I want a baby for Christmas.  A puppy would be nice but a poor second.  What is it you want during the holidays this year??

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Topsy Turvy Town

I think that was a Bosco song.  Correct me if I’m wrong.  In case you don’t know Bosco was an obnoxious little puppet that lived in a box and always visited the zoo.  Kids program over here years ago.  I loved it and it came out on dvd last year or the year before.  Class.  He’s (it?) probably the reason I’m the way I am 🙂

 Anyway, I’m over earlier’s little mishap.  Not really but I’m able to write a sentence without swearing so that’s progress mate. 

So, a while ago, I turned on my laptop, ready to face blogland yet again.  It started running fine until it got to the desktop.   Which was upside down.  I sat there for a couple of moments wondering if I was going mad or if somehow my son had manged to twist the screen upside down.  It does twist but not that far.  I restarted the computer.  Same thing again.  Desktop was now upside down land.  W.T.F…?

If Mr. Claire had been here, I would have blamed him in an instant.  Have you ever downloaded those practical joke things that make the mouse go haywire when someone tries to use it and stupid stuff like that?  I used to do that on my old boss.  He thought computers were dangerous as it was without me wrecking his head but it was so funny watching him get freaked out about it.  He could take a joke.  I can’t.  But Mr. Claire was in work so it couldn’t have been down to him. 

I did a system restore thingymabob back to yesterday and everything is okay now, obviously, since I’m writing a post.  But I still don’t know what happened.  Can anyone tell me?  I didn’t even know you could get the desktop to go upside down.  It was so freaky trying to click things off the screen.  Anyway, I want to know how to do it again so I can freak Mr. Claire out next time he uses the laptop.  Things like that baffle him and I don’t really have a whole lot to do since NaNoWriMo ended and my kids went for a nap.  What can I say, I’m easily amused.

Oh, and The Late Late Toy Show is not worth a whole post so I’ll add a little end note here.  The Late Late Show is a longstanding talk show over here that’s on every Friday Night.  It was hosted by Gay Byrne for years and now Pat Kenny has taken over.  Anyway, if you’re a kid it’s the second most boring programme in the universe.  (Live at Three was the worst by far).  But, there is one day every year where they devote the entire show to toys.  Then, it is the best show in the world.  So last Friday was that day (or night). 

The repeat is always on a Sunday afternoon and as I missed the live version, I have the repeat on now.  It’s such a load of crap now.  It’s so….boring.  There’s no atmosphere.  Sure, there’s lots of toys and Christmassy stuff but there’s no happy feeling.  Even my kids got bored and fell asleep rather than watch it.  When I was a kid, it was the best thing in the world.  You’d see all of these lucky kids that were mostly incredibly posh.  There’s always one incredibly common token kid.  They (and sometimes celebrities) would get to test out toys and go on the show and talk about them.  There would be kids dancing and singing and the audience would get lots of free toys.  The catchphrase for the Late Late Show is – “There’s one for everyone in the audience.”  The highlight of this year’s show was a kid saying they didn’t like a boy doll because he had a “you-know-what.”  *Sigh*

The toys are getting better, but it’s still so boring.  I look forward to this every year and I’ll admit, it’s been lacking in the last few years but there’s always some redeeming feature.  Like that little boy who sang “Shout” and was surprised by Girls Aloud behind him.  He was the cutest child.  He made me cry and I still have no idea why.  Can’t find a clip of that unfortunately.  Somethings were as expected.  Pat Kenny wearing a ridiculously ugly jumper.  Toys not working.  Kids getting cheeky.  “You DON’T do it like that!”   Dustin stealing the show…Gerrup outta that!

Maybe I’m just getting too old to enjoy it anymore. 🙂

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Mobiles and Decorations

Oops, I got into trouble yesterday.  Apparently I scared people because my phone was switched off and I wasn’t online.  I must spend a lot of time online if people think I’m dead because I haven’t checked my emails.  This is what I hate about mobile phones and the like.  You can’t get any peace.  I’m lazy about charging my phone because I always forget what the charger looks like so it’s a bit of a hassle trying to find it.  I don’t switch it off on purpose – the battery just goes on me a lot.  Like every day, stupid rubbish battery.

So anyways, I got a bit of a lecture about it, felt about ten years old and it isn’t the first time either!!  If I don’t check my bebo page often, I end up getting private mail asking what’s wrong.  When I see my family they moan at me for appearing offline on msn. I always do that and forget to take it off when I see a family member online. It bugs them because they don’t know if I’m not ok or if I’m online and just ignoring them…I’m not, I swear 🙂

In future I’m just going to make sure I keep the damn phone on. To be fair I get worried when I try and ring someone and their phone is switched off or if I mail my brother and I don’t get a reply for a few days so yet again I’m a hypocrite. I know this.

As for yesterday, I spent it getting in the Christmas spirit. My son wanted to watch Transformers. His Dad bought the dvd series AND the old film for himself and doesn’t even pretend it’s for the kid. Anyway, I said no, let’s watch something else cos I was in the humour of something Christmassy. So, I put on The Santa Clause 2 (we watched it twice *sigh*) and he kept yelling Santy all the way through it. Good thing I haven’t bought new decorations yet or I would have put them up yesterday. I was all Tis the Season… I’m sort of afraid to go to my mother’s house because she puts decorations up very early. I’m scared she might outdo herself this year. She’s a bit of a mad one when it comes to decorations and lights and all that jazz. She decorates for everything, even Valentines Day. I used to be embarrassed to bring anyone into the house when I was younger, just in case they thought that was insane. 🙂

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Santy Is Chasing Me, Leggit!

People keep telling me how many days and weeks it is until Christmas.  I keep ignoring them.  People are mean.  Big….meanies.  I don’t want to know it’s nearly Christmas.  I don’t want to know that I’m not prepared.  I don’t want to know that I won’t be prepared even if I start shopping now.  This very second.  It won’t make an iota of a difference.  I’m already screwed. 

 Every ad break panics me a little bit more.  In the evenings, every second ad is for a child’s toy, an expensive one, like a lifesize doll house that could realistically not fit comfortably in most homes.  My home is not most homes, a normal sized doll house wouldn’t fit in this hole.  During the day, every single ad is for a child’s toy.  I dread it when my son wants to watch Spongebob because the ads on Nickelodeon hypnotise him into a wide eyed trance only to be broken by the sound of his drool hitting the floor.

 I would spoil my son if I could.  By a lot of people’s standards he is spoiled but I mean really spoil him.  If I had the room, I would buy him a room full of toys for Christmas but the more I buy, the more his favourite toys need to move on elsewhere.  For his first Christmas, we bought everything, even though he was only 5 months old because it was his First Christmas.  For his second Christmas, we bought everything because it was the First Christmas He Could Walk.  For his third Christmas, we bought him everything because it was The Last Christmas He Would Be An Only Child.  We always find an excuse.  This year he will be three, his new sister will be 10 months at Christmas.  So, it will be her First Christmas, her First Christmas She Could Walk and his First Christmas As A Big Brother and First Christmas He Was Potty-Trained.

This puts pressure on me.  A lot of it.  Because I am the one that has to watch him every day.  And her for that matter.  I have to watch his big blue eyes light up at the sight of every single ad break, have to hear him get completely hyper because he is looking through a toy catalogue.  It is I who has to figure out what toys he likes the best when he seems to be completely, head over heels with every single one.  It’s tiring.  I always need to pick presents that aren’t too big. 

I have no idea what I’m getting my daughter.  It won’t matter because she will be only interested in the toys her brother has anyway.  I’m definitely getting her a doll of some sort because I’m pretty sick of playing trains and running around the flat pretending I’m a car.  Yes, you heard me, I play.  My son even gets me to sit on his trike while he stands in the basket/carrier thing at the back and makes me push us around.  I can’t use the pedals…I’m small but I’m not that small.  Mr. Claire has often caught my son and I looking guilty because we both know I’m far too grown up to be cycling a trike around in a tiny circle with my son whooping on the back of it.

Yesterday, we discovered that my son had broken  my digital camera.  I am upset about that because that means I won’t have one by Christmas more than likely.  But it gave me a kickass idea.  I’m going to get my son one of those kids digital cameras that you can bate off the walls and it won’t break.  It better not break anway, that’s all I’m saying.  Not looking at any toymakers in particular.  It’s perfect for his obsession with taking photos of his feet, my hair, his Thomas the Tank Engine trains and the television.  He’ll have great fun trying to take pictures of everyone during Christmas.  Hopefully not me.  Maybe I can set up some sort of drunken blackmail scheme with the help of my 3 year old and his toy camera, help pay for him to go to college.  So his “big” present will actually be something small.  Unless he discovers that sending a letter to Santy could nab him something cooler and louder and bigger and more expensive. 

I’ve already gotten a lecture from “Granny” threatening me to bring him to see Santy this year.  *Guilty Secret No. 1,000,931 – I have never brought my son to see Santy*  I’m sorry about that, I meant to but the time just started speeding up until it was already Christmas and I had no money left!  I hate when people tell me to do something that I already know I should be doing.  It does nothing but make me feel guilty.   So…I guess it serves its purpose, damnit.

Does anyone else use Feedburner by the way?  I know that’s drastically off topic but it’s pissing me the hell off.  It’s not working right at all.  Nobody’s feeds seem to be updating and if they don’t update I forget about them unless I see them around somewhere and that’s so irritating.  I end up missing out on something important, or funny, or, I don’t know, just stuff.  I like reading people’s blogs in the order they write them and I just want to know if it’s just my problem or if everyone is finding it dodgy lately. 

 By the way, Merry poxy Christmas.  🙂

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Major Headache

A really bad headache started this morning and it’s getting worse as the day goes on.  I think I must extra irritable this week 🙂

 On my other blog this morning, a comment was posted saying that I had to remove a post or the matter would be passed onto “the” solicitors.  Of course, I have to get riled up and reply.  And annoy myself for the entire day *sigh*  When will I ever learn 🙂

 Forgetting about that, something is approaching that I can’t forget about no matter how much I try.  Christmas.  Santa Claus.  Decorations.  Presents.  I.  Can’t.  Cope.

Yesterday, in the middle of the paper was an Argos magazine full of toys.  My son had a field day.  All I heard all day long was Mammy, look at that!  Oh, Mam, Thomas the Tank Engine!, Mammy, what’s that?  Mammy, Mam, Ma, look, Look, LOOK!  My head felt like it was going to explode.  Usually I’m a lot more patient when the lil fella looks at pictures of toys, I remember what it was like to get so over excited about it but yesterday I was too concerned with the Christmassy pictures reminding me that I have nothing prepared or planned. 

I am completely hopeless when it comes to Christmas.  Everything happens at the last minute in a rush (if they happen at all) and I am by far, the worst gift buyer in the whole wide world.  Doesn’t matter how well I know someone, I cannot think of one good present to get them.  If they only knew the pain loved ones put me through when they say things like, ah, I don’t want anything, or, anything you get will be lovely, I’m sure.  No, no, it won’t, are you forgetting the present I got you last year??

Ooh, hyperventilating just a little bit now…I can’t handle the pressure of gift buying you see.  I wish I had a personal shopper that was so clever, they could tell me exactly what to get everyone I know.  Actually, it would be easier if people would just tell me what they want and not act all coy about it.  Just give it up!  Help me, help you.  It’s not so much to ask is it?

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